Public Service Announcement
Ok people, driving is a privilege, not a right. So you should try to do it to the best of your ability, right? After all, your life (or someone else's) may depend on it. Now, I'm originally from Massachusetts, where drivers are so bad, they're called Massholes. I'm not kidding. But this week in Maine I've seen some pretty crappy driving. For example:
To the chick in the Green Jeep Cherokee with Maine license plate JAA - driving while talking on the phone with one hand and brushing your hair with the other IS NOT A GOOD IDEA. Stop it now. It's dangerous for one, and you look like an idiot, for another. Keep at a MINIMUM one hand on the wheel. What were you driving with -- your boobs?
To the idiot driving North on 295 in Portland and exiting at the Falmouth exit at 5:30 p.m. on Monday, DO NOT READ THE SPORTS PAGE WHILE DRIVING. KEEP YOUR EYES ON THE ROAD, not at the paper in your lap. Got it?
To the crazy lady in the white Ford something - what the hell were you doing yesterday morning on I90 going into Portland? Why were you swerving all over the road? It must have made your dog nauseous. I thought you might have been impaired, but after 10 minutes you got your crap together and started driving straight, but I was THIS CLOSE to pulling into the state trooper barracks and getting one of them to follow you. You nearly sideswiped FIVE cars and some type of chemical tanker.
You people are so damn distracting, you're going to make ME have an accident. Come on, let's drive!
To the chick in the Green Jeep Cherokee with Maine license plate JAA - driving while talking on the phone with one hand and brushing your hair with the other IS NOT A GOOD IDEA. Stop it now. It's dangerous for one, and you look like an idiot, for another. Keep at a MINIMUM one hand on the wheel. What were you driving with -- your boobs?
To the idiot driving North on 295 in Portland and exiting at the Falmouth exit at 5:30 p.m. on Monday, DO NOT READ THE SPORTS PAGE WHILE DRIVING. KEEP YOUR EYES ON THE ROAD, not at the paper in your lap. Got it?
To the crazy lady in the white Ford something - what the hell were you doing yesterday morning on I90 going into Portland? Why were you swerving all over the road? It must have made your dog nauseous. I thought you might have been impaired, but after 10 minutes you got your crap together and started driving straight, but I was THIS CLOSE to pulling into the state trooper barracks and getting one of them to follow you. You nearly sideswiped FIVE cars and some type of chemical tanker.
You people are so damn distracting, you're going to make ME have an accident. Come on, let's drive!
posted by The Queen's Stitch at 1:20 PM Permalink
7 Comments:
You are a riot! And soooo right! NH has it's share of beauts too. I love the ladies who drive with thier dogs in their lap. If they ever crash, the poor pups will go squish like grape. Ann.
Amen, Girlfriend!
LOL!
Yep, those drivers come to NH too!!
I suffer from Anxiety, and getting on the road is when it is the very worst. I get so freaked out by what other people do and how they drive, it scares the living **** out of me!!!
I do love the nickname massholes though, that is great!
I can understand frustration! My soon-to-be 17 year old just started driving. I'm not worried about his driving, he's pretty responsible, it's all the other idiots on the road that bother me!
Glad you made it home safely!
I would guess that some Massholes must've moved to Maine. LOL!!!
I keep meaning to ask, did you use the linen provided in the kit for Frances Burwell?
Hugs,
Katrina
Post a Comment
<< Home